just breathe.... just believe.... 12 days.

Breathe.................... Just believe..........................

Long long long time since I logged in here to rant/vent/blab.
Many many things have happened in this "long long long time" period so a quick update.
Very quickly now.

Got a new job. A job I've prayed to get and praises belong to Allah for granting me what I asked for.
Insya Allah I can manage to fit in the new environment and more importantly to manage well my new tasks. Totally different field. I really got out of my comfort zone this time. Medical jargons, a mentor who's excellent at her job but useless as a trainer. Mencabar kesabaran betol tu makcik! but wat to do...? Sabar je Shah... Hari ni hari dia, besok besok MY TURN!
Hey Cik, get out da way...! get out da way cik, get out da way! hahahaha!!!
it's extremely hectic at the wards. Such a culture shock! I've always thought as hospitals to be a place of rest and care and library-like environment, to put it simply but OH MA GOD! I cannot be more wrong. The place is a freakin' market. I wonder if the patients get any moment of peace and quite at all or are they just enduring the noise coz being too sick and weak to complain...
Talking about loud noises, I can imagine how the sounds of hell-dwellers must be like. The elderly patients moan and groan in pain and the woman patients crying very loudly on their beds.... It's really a heartache to hear. Keinsafan just overwhelms me at that moment.
there was one time whejn i had to translate to a makcik that the docs had to amputate her leg as she was a DM case. DM means the pt is a diabetic. Power ar.. . Her name was Isah. It was heartwrenching I tell ya. The way she accepts the information and the resignation on her face as I told her... I broke in tears when I returned to my table. I really hope she's in better health now and may her sins be forgiven.
*i wanna cry now.* sigh...
But it's good lah. although there's 1000001 things to learn (*the hard way I might add), insya Allah once I can get the hang of it, all is well. Insya Allah.
I need to state here, doctors should not be allowed to write. there should be a ruling to say that all doctors need to type anything and everything and not own any writing material coz too many of these darn docs write in the language only they understand - sometimes they dun even themselves! blei? urgh! So what's the freakin' point of writing rite????

occupational hazards aside, I'm having what ppl call "wedding jitters"?
12 more days to the big event! less than 2 weeks and a lot more needs done and whole lot more than that to ....... . Just breathe......................... Just believe.......

a year's preparations for a 2 day event. I just want it over with for everyone! Many ppl is affected but there is one individual who really pains me to see her stressed. I hate to think that my supposedly joyous occasion can bring such sorrow to the ppl i love.

Just breathe.................................
Just believe................................................