2 tix to the Big Wheel

I've said this before and yes, I wanna say it again here. Humans are but emotional creatures. This is very true for me. This roller coaster ride of life.. I'm affected. Up! up! up! Weeee!... Do0o0owns.. :( and dun forget the 360degree twirls. Those are the best. Situations which happen so sudden, they turn ur life upside down, although not so literally in this case but you get what I mean yah. Those crossjunctions. Here or there? Right or left? This path or that? Or maybe, both paths are dark and not suitable for you to take either but you're so caught up with the feeling at the moment that you're swayed to make that decision... Or worse, maybe, just maybe the old path is the correct way for you but you just didn't try when given that second chance. (think you may have sense this now, I'm not the most confident and optimistic of ppl :S I'm just being honest with my thoughts...) But have to add here that most times, those sudden changes turn ur past upside-down life, right side up again. =) There's hikmah in e-ve-rything that happens. Think about it. Allah Is Most Merciful. Change happens all the time, to everyone. Change is good and necessary. But there is that uncertainty with every change that happens, we call this feeling "DOUBT". I don't like doubt. I'm not a risk taker, I just wanna be sure or at least confident of my actions are true and correct.. I prefer the ferris wheel now... Round and round we go.. A calm and refreshing ride indeed. Pening jugak ah but I'll take it! Don't think it will cause as much convulsion as the rollercoaster. So 2 tix for the Big Wheel plsssss!!... hahaa!

Doubt goes hand in hand with "FEAR". And fear strikes into the heart of just about anything with a pulse. At this moment in my life, doubt is holding my left hand and fear is on my right. Ya Allah. Berikanlah petunjuk kepada hambaMu ini. I need YOUR guidance Oh Allah! Only YOU Know what lies ahead for this servant.. Aku mohon Ya Allah, dekatkanlah padaku apa yang baik utkku, dan jauhkanlah pula apa yg tidak baik untukku. Sesungguhnya Engkaulah Yang Maha Mengetahui akan segala-galanya, ya Tuhanku. Amin. To all those reading this (a grand total of 2 ppl i think. hahaa!) pls insert doa' here ->________________. Amin. Thanks guys.. Jazakallah khair. Ngan doa2 ikan di laut,semut2,pokok2... InsyAllah. *wink*.tee hee..

Sometimes new beginning stir up past ends. ............................... Dun wish to elaborate here but let's just say "BIG shoes to fill"... Insya Allah Shah, you can do it! Yeah! heee.. With Allah swt on your side, you can do just about anything. Insya Allah. Eeerr...the fear's creeping in again as I'm typing this... Dang it! What am I so scared about?! Pft! Maybe the uncertainties is overwhelming or the confidence level is just tooooooo low. I've got issues. I need to act prouder. At least a lil' bit laaa... hee... First impressions counts but the the true you is the one that lasts the test of time. I'm happy with being me but I tend to downplay my plus points. And I DO have plus points okay?. heee.. ahem.. dah proud dah. Hahaa.. But seriously, I'm not trying to preject humility here.. No. But rather I think this is what pyschiatrists label as plain low self-esteem. Sad sey Shah. sigh... hahaa.. I need to work on this, I know. Bad habit! tsk. Kaaay..enuf of that.. :S With guidance from HIM, I know I can perform my future duties ngan baik dan sempurna, Insya Allah. No worries. Easy does it. :)

I have so many entries saved only as drafts. I pretty much wanna post them up here but decided against to. Hmmm.. Very personal stuff. Classified information. I can share, and you can read but I'd have to kill you after. Sheeeeeesh.. Only for my eyes for now. Dun even know why I'm mentioning those drafts here if I'm not sharing but... I dunno. I'm just happy laa. hahaa!

Insya Allah, I ask Allah for this happy feeling to envelope me for a long time ahead.
Grow old with you? I'd like that very much.

sweet treats. sweeter memories. Thank you!


p/s: Shem just inform me of something excellent. Expect a mini-Shem soon. Alhamdulillah!! Rezeki Allah.
I shall write about that once she pass me the baby's ultra scanshots i think. =)